Develop Internal Control to Reduce Stress

Develop An Internal Locus of Control
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide

Updated January 26, 2007

About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board

Research has shown that those with an internal locus of control--that is, they feel that they control their own destiny, rather than their fate being largely determined by external forces--tend to be happier, less depressed, and less stressed. Fortunately, if your locus of control isn't as 'internal' as you'd like it to be, there are things you can do to change your locus of control and empower yourself. Here's a process to practice:

Difficulty: Average
Time Required: A Few Minutes

Here's How:

1. Realize that you always have choice to change your situation. Even if you don’t like the choices available at the moment, even if the only change you can make is in your attitude, you always have some choices.

2. When you feel trapped, make a list of all possible courses of action. Just brainstorm and write things down without evaluating them first.

3. You may want to also brainstorm with a friend to get more ideas that you may not have initially considered. Don’t shoot down these ideas right away, either; just write them down.

4. When you have a list, evaluate each one and decide on the best course of action for you, and keep the others in the back of your mind as alternative options. You may end up with the same answer you had before the brainstorming session, but this exercise can open your eyes to the amount of choices you have in a given situation. Seeing new possibilities will become more of a habit.

5. Repeat this practice when you feel trapped in frustrating situations in your life. In more casual, everyday situations, you can still expand your mind to new possibilities by doing this quickly and mentally.

Tips:

1. Notice your language and self talk. If you tend to speak in absolutes, stop. If your self talk is generally negative, read this article on the effects of negative self talk and how to make your self talk more positive.

2. Phase out phrases like, ‘I have no choice’, and, ‘I can’t…” You can replace them with, ‘I choose not to,’ or, ‘I don’t like my choices, but I will…’ Realizing and acknowledging that you always have choice (even if the choices aren’t ideal) can help you to change your situation, or accept it more easily if it really is the best of all available options.

3. Your attitude affects your stress level more than you may realize. This article can help you to learn more about mental and personality factors that influence your stress level, so you can make changes to keep stress down.

MY THOUGHTS

effective people gets all kinds of stressors but are able to manage their stress. habit #1 of the 7 habits of highly effective people is all about the locus of control. believe me, participants to the workshops that i ran almost always claimed that they have this kind of control. covey's principles however shoots right to the heart of the matter. and after the session on proactivity, most participants would say they do not actually have the control that they thought they have. it's apparent even in the way we speak - "i have no choice","there's nothing i can do", "this is just the way i am", "they won't allow that". so,if you've read this blog, read it again. and again. until you get it. then you'll know what i'm talking about.