Develop An Internal Locus of Control
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated January 26, 2007
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Research has shown that those with an internal locus of control--that is, they feel that they control their own destiny, rather than their fate being largely determined by external forces--tend to be happier, less depressed, and less stressed. Fortunately, if your locus of control isn't as 'internal' as you'd like it to be, there are things you can do to change your locus of control and empower yourself. Here's a process to practice:
Difficulty: Average
Time Required: A Few Minutes
Here's How:
1. Realize that you always have choice to change your situation. Even if you don’t like the choices available at the moment, even if the only change you can make is in your attitude, you always have some choices.
2. When you feel trapped, make a list of all possible courses of action. Just brainstorm and write things down without evaluating them first.
3. You may want to also brainstorm with a friend to get more ideas that you may not have initially considered. Don’t shoot down these ideas right away, either; just write them down.
4. When you have a list, evaluate each one and decide on the best course of action for you, and keep the others in the back of your mind as alternative options. You may end up with the same answer you had before the brainstorming session, but this exercise can open your eyes to the amount of choices you have in a given situation. Seeing new possibilities will become more of a habit.
5. Repeat this practice when you feel trapped in frustrating situations in your life. In more casual, everyday situations, you can still expand your mind to new possibilities by doing this quickly and mentally.
Tips:
1. Notice your language and self talk. If you tend to speak in absolutes, stop. If your self talk is generally negative, read this article on the effects of negative self talk and how to make your self talk more positive.
2. Phase out phrases like, ‘I have no choice’, and, ‘I can’t…” You can replace them with, ‘I choose not to,’ or, ‘I don’t like my choices, but I will…’ Realizing and acknowledging that you always have choice (even if the choices aren’t ideal) can help you to change your situation, or accept it more easily if it really is the best of all available options.
3. Your attitude affects your stress level more than you may realize. This article can help you to learn more about mental and personality factors that influence your stress level, so you can make changes to keep stress down.
MY THOUGHTS
effective people gets all kinds of stressors but are able to manage their stress. habit #1 of the 7 habits of highly effective people is all about the locus of control. believe me, participants to the workshops that i ran almost always claimed that they have this kind of control. covey's principles however shoots right to the heart of the matter. and after the session on proactivity, most participants would say they do not actually have the control that they thought they have. it's apparent even in the way we speak - "i have no choice","there's nothing i can do", "this is just the way i am", "they won't allow that". so,if you've read this blog, read it again. and again. until you get it. then you'll know what i'm talking about.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
relax with humor
Maintain A Sense of Humor
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated August 16, 2010
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Developing a sense of humor about life’s challenges is an effective coping technique that can actually lead to better overall health as well as simple stress management. That’s because, aside from the health benefits of laughter (which are numerous and significant), having a sense of humor about life’s difficulties can provide a way to bond with others, look at things in a different way, normalize your experience, and keep things from appearing too overwhelming or scary. Properly developed, a good sense of humor can keep people and relationships strong. Here’s how to develop yours:
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: Ongoing
Here's How:
1. Start With a Smile.
Studies show that having a smile on your face can release endorphins, which make you feel better, and can lead you to actually feeling more happy (rather than just looking more happy). If you are able to put a smile on your face, the laughter will come more easily, and the stress will melt more readily.
2. Take A Step Back.
When you’re in the middle of a difficult situation, it can seem overwhelming. If you try to see your situation as an observer would, it’s often easier to recognize what’s funny. For example, Lucy Ricardo (of the television classic, I Love Lucy) may have found nothing funny in getting locked in a freezer, having a fight with a fellow grape-squasher in a vineyard, or getting drunk while filming a television commercial for Vitamedaveggemin, but watching these scenarios can be hilarious. Sometimes imagining how you would look in a sitcom can be the secret key to finding the humor in a situation.
3. Value The Extremes.
If your situation seems ridiculously frustrating, recognize the potential humor in just how ridiculously frustrating and annoying it is. In your imagination, take the situation to an extreme that becomes even more ridiculous until you find yourself amused. For example, when you’re waiting in a long line at the store, you can imagine that hours pass, then days, visualizing yourself accepting visits from loved ones from your new home in this ultra-long line, holding your children’s birthday parties in aisle seven so you can be there to enjoy them…you get the picture.
4. Have A Funny Buddy.
Find a friend with whom you can laugh, and let the relationship work for you! You can each share your frustrations, and laugh about them in the process. Even when your friend isn’t there, you can lighten your mood in a dark situation by thinking about the retelling that will come later.
5. Make It A Game.
You can have a ‘most annoying boss’ contest with your friends, or try to count how many times the same potentially frustrating event happens in a day. (I was cut off in traffic 7 times today—I’m almost up to 10!) This works well for predictably or repetitive annoying situations that you can’t control; you can begin to value them in their own special way instead of letting them upset you.
6. Watch Funny Shows and Movies.
One of the factors that drive the popularity of shows like The Office or Everybody Loves Raymond, or movies like the classic Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, is that they take somewhat universal situations that many people find frustrating and push them a little further, pointing out the silliness of it all. Realizing that some universally annoying situations are actually funny, can help you endure them with a smile—even if it’s a wry or ironic smile.
7. Read Funny Books.
Read humorous essays like those of Dave Barry or David Sedaris, both of whom are able to take events, ranging from annoying to upsetting to even tragic, and find the humor—each in his own unique way. Also recommended are the humorous tidbits in Reader’s Digest, as well as classic humor books like Jerry Seinfeld’s SeinLanguage. Reading others’ humorous interpretations of life can help you find your own style of seeing the world in a different light.
8. Visit Funny Websites.
I love About.com’s Political Humor site, as it very effectively takes the normally frustrating and annoying (for me) world of politics and brings it to a very funny place. (The site can also serve as a reminder of how to see the humor in other situations in life.) I also recommend About.com’s general site, and David Letterman’s archives of Top 10 Lists for a good laugh.
9. Join Funny Clubs.
Oprah did a segment on Laughter Yoga that intrigued me, and I researched a club on my own, finding it to be a terrific place to enjoy a good laugh. Whether you’re taking the laughing seriously or laughing at the silliness of it all, taking part in the exercises of laughter yoga with other humor-participants can be a very effective way to get back in the practice of getting some more giggles into your day.
10. Email This Page To A Friend
MY THOUGHTS
there are days we cannot even start with a smile, right? and these are the days we need humor the most. taking a step back helps. but being with happy, funny (but sensible) people is still the best. it's hard not to have humor when you're surrounded by it. and yes, you forget about your woes once you start laughing.
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated August 16, 2010
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Developing a sense of humor about life’s challenges is an effective coping technique that can actually lead to better overall health as well as simple stress management. That’s because, aside from the health benefits of laughter (which are numerous and significant), having a sense of humor about life’s difficulties can provide a way to bond with others, look at things in a different way, normalize your experience, and keep things from appearing too overwhelming or scary. Properly developed, a good sense of humor can keep people and relationships strong. Here’s how to develop yours:
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: Ongoing
Here's How:
1. Start With a Smile.
Studies show that having a smile on your face can release endorphins, which make you feel better, and can lead you to actually feeling more happy (rather than just looking more happy). If you are able to put a smile on your face, the laughter will come more easily, and the stress will melt more readily.
2. Take A Step Back.
When you’re in the middle of a difficult situation, it can seem overwhelming. If you try to see your situation as an observer would, it’s often easier to recognize what’s funny. For example, Lucy Ricardo (of the television classic, I Love Lucy) may have found nothing funny in getting locked in a freezer, having a fight with a fellow grape-squasher in a vineyard, or getting drunk while filming a television commercial for Vitamedaveggemin, but watching these scenarios can be hilarious. Sometimes imagining how you would look in a sitcom can be the secret key to finding the humor in a situation.
3. Value The Extremes.
If your situation seems ridiculously frustrating, recognize the potential humor in just how ridiculously frustrating and annoying it is. In your imagination, take the situation to an extreme that becomes even more ridiculous until you find yourself amused. For example, when you’re waiting in a long line at the store, you can imagine that hours pass, then days, visualizing yourself accepting visits from loved ones from your new home in this ultra-long line, holding your children’s birthday parties in aisle seven so you can be there to enjoy them…you get the picture.
4. Have A Funny Buddy.
Find a friend with whom you can laugh, and let the relationship work for you! You can each share your frustrations, and laugh about them in the process. Even when your friend isn’t there, you can lighten your mood in a dark situation by thinking about the retelling that will come later.
5. Make It A Game.
You can have a ‘most annoying boss’ contest with your friends, or try to count how many times the same potentially frustrating event happens in a day. (I was cut off in traffic 7 times today—I’m almost up to 10!) This works well for predictably or repetitive annoying situations that you can’t control; you can begin to value them in their own special way instead of letting them upset you.
6. Watch Funny Shows and Movies.
One of the factors that drive the popularity of shows like The Office or Everybody Loves Raymond, or movies like the classic Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, is that they take somewhat universal situations that many people find frustrating and push them a little further, pointing out the silliness of it all. Realizing that some universally annoying situations are actually funny, can help you endure them with a smile—even if it’s a wry or ironic smile.
7. Read Funny Books.
Read humorous essays like those of Dave Barry or David Sedaris, both of whom are able to take events, ranging from annoying to upsetting to even tragic, and find the humor—each in his own unique way. Also recommended are the humorous tidbits in Reader’s Digest, as well as classic humor books like Jerry Seinfeld’s SeinLanguage. Reading others’ humorous interpretations of life can help you find your own style of seeing the world in a different light.
8. Visit Funny Websites.
I love About.com’s Political Humor site, as it very effectively takes the normally frustrating and annoying (for me) world of politics and brings it to a very funny place. (The site can also serve as a reminder of how to see the humor in other situations in life.) I also recommend About.com’s general site, and David Letterman’s archives of Top 10 Lists for a good laugh.
9. Join Funny Clubs.
Oprah did a segment on Laughter Yoga that intrigued me, and I researched a club on my own, finding it to be a terrific place to enjoy a good laugh. Whether you’re taking the laughing seriously or laughing at the silliness of it all, taking part in the exercises of laughter yoga with other humor-participants can be a very effective way to get back in the practice of getting some more giggles into your day.
10. Email This Page To A Friend
MY THOUGHTS
there are days we cannot even start with a smile, right? and these are the days we need humor the most. taking a step back helps. but being with happy, funny (but sensible) people is still the best. it's hard not to have humor when you're surrounded by it. and yes, you forget about your woes once you start laughing.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Relieve Stress With Visualization Breathing
Relieve Stress With Visualization Breathing
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated February 21, 2009
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Both visualization and breathing exercises have been found to be great stress relief strategies. Here are some ways that you can use visualization techniques with breathing exercises to achieve quick and effective stress relief.
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 5 or More Minutes
Here's How:
1. Close Your Eyes And Relax.
Let your breathing become slower and deeper.
2. Practice Stress Relief Breathing.
Breathe from your diaphragm or belly instead of from your shoulders or chest. Don't force it, but let your breathing become natural and relaxed.
3. Visualize...
As you breathe in, imagine that 'relaxation' is coming into your body and flowing through your limbs, reaching every part of you. As you exhale, imagine that all the stress from your body is being exhaled. After a few minutes, you should feel more 'full' of peace, and the stress in your body should be reduced.
4. Or...
As you breathe, imagine that your hands and feet are getting warmer. With practice, this can further reverse your stress response and actually warm your extremities, relaxing your body in the process.
5. Another Idea...
Imagine that, with each breath, your body is becoming more and more loose. With each exhale, your limbs are a little more like spaghetti, your face a little more expressionless, your body a still pool of water.
6. Keep Breathing.
For five minutes or twenty, continuing this exercise can relieve stress and help you return to your activities (and stressors) with a renewed sense of strength and serenity.
Tips:
1. If you're really tired and fear that this will put you to sleep, keep your practice to about 5 minutes, or set an alarm.
2. Conversely, if you're having trouble sleeping, this exercise may prove very helpful.
3. You may also want to try other breathing exercises.
MY THOUGHTS
i'm never gonna be able to do this. i'm more the get-up-and-run to relieve stress. when i'm awfully stressed and you ask me to stay put even for just 5 minutes, i will probably explode. let me try this tonight though. even if i'm not stressed.
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated February 21, 2009
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Both visualization and breathing exercises have been found to be great stress relief strategies. Here are some ways that you can use visualization techniques with breathing exercises to achieve quick and effective stress relief.
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 5 or More Minutes
Here's How:
1. Close Your Eyes And Relax.
Let your breathing become slower and deeper.
2. Practice Stress Relief Breathing.
Breathe from your diaphragm or belly instead of from your shoulders or chest. Don't force it, but let your breathing become natural and relaxed.
3. Visualize...
As you breathe in, imagine that 'relaxation' is coming into your body and flowing through your limbs, reaching every part of you. As you exhale, imagine that all the stress from your body is being exhaled. After a few minutes, you should feel more 'full' of peace, and the stress in your body should be reduced.
4. Or...
As you breathe, imagine that your hands and feet are getting warmer. With practice, this can further reverse your stress response and actually warm your extremities, relaxing your body in the process.
5. Another Idea...
Imagine that, with each breath, your body is becoming more and more loose. With each exhale, your limbs are a little more like spaghetti, your face a little more expressionless, your body a still pool of water.
6. Keep Breathing.
For five minutes or twenty, continuing this exercise can relieve stress and help you return to your activities (and stressors) with a renewed sense of strength and serenity.
Tips:
1. If you're really tired and fear that this will put you to sleep, keep your practice to about 5 minutes, or set an alarm.
2. Conversely, if you're having trouble sleeping, this exercise may prove very helpful.
3. You may also want to try other breathing exercises.
MY THOUGHTS
i'm never gonna be able to do this. i'm more the get-up-and-run to relieve stress. when i'm awfully stressed and you ask me to stay put even for just 5 minutes, i will probably explode. let me try this tonight though. even if i'm not stressed.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Reduce Tension with Progressive Muscle Relaxation
Reduce Tension with Progressive Muscle Relaxation
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated September 24, 2008
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR) is a great technique for reducing overall body tension. As you practice tensing and relaxing all the muscle groups in your body, you can move to a shortened procedure, Deep Muscle Relaxation where you rapidly relax your whole body. As you reduce the tension you carry in your body, your whole being will feel less stress and you will enjoy increased physical and emotional health. Here’s how to get started:
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 5 Minutes
Here's How:
1. After finding a quiet place and several free minutes to practice progressive muscle relaxation, sit or lie down and make yourself comfortable.
2. Begin by tensing all the muscles in your face. Make a tight grimace, close your eyes as tightly as possible, clench your teeth, even move your ears up if you can. Hold this for the count of eight as you inhale.
3. Now exhale and relax completely. Let your face go completely lax, as though you were sleeping. Feel the tension seep from your facial muscles, and enjoy the feeling.
4. Next, completely tense your neck and shoulders, again inhaling and counting to eight. Then exhale and relax.
5. Continue down your body, repeating the procedure with the following muscle groups:
* chest
* abdomen
* entire right arm
* right forearm and hand (making a fist)
* right hand
* entire left arm
* left forearm and hand (again, making a fist)
* left hand
* buttocks
* entire right leg
* lower right leg and foot
* right foot
* entire left leg
* lower left leg and foot
* left foot
6. for the shortened version, which includes just four main muscle groups:
* face
* neck, shoulders and arms
* abdomen and chest
* buttocks, legs and feet
Quickly focusing on each group one after the other, with practice you can relax your body like ‘liquid relaxation’ poured on your head and it flowed down and completely covered you. You can use progressive muscle relaxation to quickly de-stress any time.
What You Need:
* A comfortable place.
* Some privacy.
* A few minutes.
MY THOUGHTS
i have a comfortable place. i have privacy (not just some). but i don't think this will take only 5 minutes. it took me all of 5 to grimace. it's quite easy tensing and relaxing the feet and the legs. but the neck is another thing. i'm so scared it would snap and i would be peaceful forever. anyway, i printed this one out. i intend to master this, one way or another.
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated September 24, 2008
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR) is a great technique for reducing overall body tension. As you practice tensing and relaxing all the muscle groups in your body, you can move to a shortened procedure, Deep Muscle Relaxation where you rapidly relax your whole body. As you reduce the tension you carry in your body, your whole being will feel less stress and you will enjoy increased physical and emotional health. Here’s how to get started:
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 5 Minutes
Here's How:
1. After finding a quiet place and several free minutes to practice progressive muscle relaxation, sit or lie down and make yourself comfortable.
2. Begin by tensing all the muscles in your face. Make a tight grimace, close your eyes as tightly as possible, clench your teeth, even move your ears up if you can. Hold this for the count of eight as you inhale.
3. Now exhale and relax completely. Let your face go completely lax, as though you were sleeping. Feel the tension seep from your facial muscles, and enjoy the feeling.
4. Next, completely tense your neck and shoulders, again inhaling and counting to eight. Then exhale and relax.
5. Continue down your body, repeating the procedure with the following muscle groups:
* chest
* abdomen
* entire right arm
* right forearm and hand (making a fist)
* right hand
* entire left arm
* left forearm and hand (again, making a fist)
* left hand
* buttocks
* entire right leg
* lower right leg and foot
* right foot
* entire left leg
* lower left leg and foot
* left foot
6. for the shortened version, which includes just four main muscle groups:
* face
* neck, shoulders and arms
* abdomen and chest
* buttocks, legs and feet
Quickly focusing on each group one after the other, with practice you can relax your body like ‘liquid relaxation’ poured on your head and it flowed down and completely covered you. You can use progressive muscle relaxation to quickly de-stress any time.
What You Need:
* A comfortable place.
* Some privacy.
* A few minutes.
MY THOUGHTS
i have a comfortable place. i have privacy (not just some). but i don't think this will take only 5 minutes. it took me all of 5 to grimace. it's quite easy tensing and relaxing the feet and the legs. but the neck is another thing. i'm so scared it would snap and i would be peaceful forever. anyway, i printed this one out. i intend to master this, one way or another.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Meditation for Stress Management
Practice Basic Meditation for Stress Management
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated October 23, 2007
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Meditation has many health benefits and is a wonderful way to relieve stress and maintain a healthier lifestyle. There are many different ways to meditate, and this is one of the most basic. With practice, you can use this technique to feel inner peace whenever you need it.
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 5 to 30 Minutes
Here's How:
1. Get into a comfortable position. Many people like to sit in a comfortable chair, or cross-legged on the ground. You want to be able to completely relax while still staying awake.
2. Close your eyes.
3. Clear your head. (This is the part that takes practice.) The idea is to stay unattached to thoughts of any kind. That means that, if that inner narrative voice in your mind speaks up, gently “shush” it and opt for internal silence.
4. That’s it. Keep letting go of any thoughts that may pop into your mind, and the quiet spaces between thoughts will become longer and more frequent. You’re on the road of meditation!
Tips:
1. Give it time. Meditation often takes practice. If you’re expecting to do it ‘perfectly’, you may actually create more stress for yourself than you relieve, and you won’t want to stick with it.
2. Start with shorter sessions—like five minutes—and work your way up to longer sessions—like 30. With practice, this type of meditation becomes easier and more effective.
3. If the experience is frustrating for you and you don’t really want to continue, you may find more success with other types of meditation like the Karate Breathing Meditation.
Source:
Davidson, Richard, et. al. Alterations in Brain and Immune Function Produced by Mindfulness Meditation. Psychosomatic Medicine, 2003.
MY THOUGHTS
tried it this morning. i fell asleep. got too relaxed. will try again tonight. maybe i should sit cross-legged on the hard floor. i can imagine how challenging this would be if you have lots of people around. but that's the best training ground. i will know for sure that i've learned the art of meditation when i can be completely peaceful and quiet and relaxed and completely in touch with my inner self even when i'm in the midst of a maddening crowd. good luck! to me!
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated October 23, 2007
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
Meditation has many health benefits and is a wonderful way to relieve stress and maintain a healthier lifestyle. There are many different ways to meditate, and this is one of the most basic. With practice, you can use this technique to feel inner peace whenever you need it.
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: 5 to 30 Minutes
Here's How:
1. Get into a comfortable position. Many people like to sit in a comfortable chair, or cross-legged on the ground. You want to be able to completely relax while still staying awake.
2. Close your eyes.
3. Clear your head. (This is the part that takes practice.) The idea is to stay unattached to thoughts of any kind. That means that, if that inner narrative voice in your mind speaks up, gently “shush” it and opt for internal silence.
4. That’s it. Keep letting go of any thoughts that may pop into your mind, and the quiet spaces between thoughts will become longer and more frequent. You’re on the road of meditation!
Tips:
1. Give it time. Meditation often takes practice. If you’re expecting to do it ‘perfectly’, you may actually create more stress for yourself than you relieve, and you won’t want to stick with it.
2. Start with shorter sessions—like five minutes—and work your way up to longer sessions—like 30. With practice, this type of meditation becomes easier and more effective.
3. If the experience is frustrating for you and you don’t really want to continue, you may find more success with other types of meditation like the Karate Breathing Meditation.
Source:
Davidson, Richard, et. al. Alterations in Brain and Immune Function Produced by Mindfulness Meditation. Psychosomatic Medicine, 2003.
MY THOUGHTS
tried it this morning. i fell asleep. got too relaxed. will try again tonight. maybe i should sit cross-legged on the hard floor. i can imagine how challenging this would be if you have lots of people around. but that's the best training ground. i will know for sure that i've learned the art of meditation when i can be completely peaceful and quiet and relaxed and completely in touch with my inner self even when i'm in the midst of a maddening crowd. good luck! to me!
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Release Tension With Stress Relief Breathing
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated October 09, 2007
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
http://stress.about.com/od/breathingexercises/ht/breathing_ex.htm
Breathing exercises are an ideal way to relieve stress in that they’re fast, simple, free, and can be performed by just about anyone. They can also be done anywhere and at virtually any time. These factors make stress relief breathing exercises one of my most popular and convenient tension tamers. Here’s how basic controlled breathing works:
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: You decide!
Here's How:
1. Sit or stand in a relaxed position.
2. Slowly inhale through your nose, counting to five in your head.
3. Let the air out from your mouth, counting to eight in your head as it leaves your lungs. Repeat several times. That’s it!
Tips:
1. As you breathe, let your abdomen expand outward, rather than raising your shoulders. This is a more relaxed and natural way to breathe, and helps your lungs fill themselves more fully with fresh air, releasing more “old” air.
2. You can do this just a few times to release tension, or for several minutes as a form of meditation.
3. If you like, you can make your throat a little tighter as you exhale so the air comes out like a whisper. This type of breathing is used in some forms of yoga and can add additional tension relief.
What You Need:
* A few seconds or minutes.
* A minimal amount of attention.
MY THOUGHTS
try it! and you'll know why you need this tip. it's not at all easy. if we want real relaxation and stress relief, we need to know proper breathing exercises.
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated October 09, 2007
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
http://stress.about.com/od/breathingexercises/ht/breathing_ex.htm
Breathing exercises are an ideal way to relieve stress in that they’re fast, simple, free, and can be performed by just about anyone. They can also be done anywhere and at virtually any time. These factors make stress relief breathing exercises one of my most popular and convenient tension tamers. Here’s how basic controlled breathing works:
Difficulty: Easy
Time Required: You decide!
Here's How:
1. Sit or stand in a relaxed position.
2. Slowly inhale through your nose, counting to five in your head.
3. Let the air out from your mouth, counting to eight in your head as it leaves your lungs. Repeat several times. That’s it!
Tips:
1. As you breathe, let your abdomen expand outward, rather than raising your shoulders. This is a more relaxed and natural way to breathe, and helps your lungs fill themselves more fully with fresh air, releasing more “old” air.
2. You can do this just a few times to release tension, or for several minutes as a form of meditation.
3. If you like, you can make your throat a little tighter as you exhale so the air comes out like a whisper. This type of breathing is used in some forms of yoga and can add additional tension relief.
What You Need:
* A few seconds or minutes.
* A minimal amount of attention.
MY THOUGHTS
try it! and you'll know why you need this tip. it's not at all easy. if we want real relaxation and stress relief, we need to know proper breathing exercises.
Monday, January 3, 2011
How To Become Relaxed
How To Become Relaxed
Get Relaxed, Stay Relaxed!
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated September 14, 2009
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
,The skills of becoming relaxed when necessary and remaining relaxed whenever possible can be transformative, and can make a measurable difference in health. This is because living in a state of chronic stress--remaining physiologically stressed over long periods of time, without triggering your body's relaxation response--can impact your health in a variety of negative ways. Learning to become relaxed readily and easily can bring a healthier and more enjoyable life.
Fortunately, there are several simple ways to become relaxed quickly and easily. They each bring their own unique benefits, so it's good to know a variety of techniques that you can use to become relaxed in a pinch. Here are some of my top recommendations:
Breathing Exercises
Breathing exercises are a terrific way to become relaxed quickly and easily--they can be done by just about anyone, anywhere and at any time. Slowing your breathing, breathing from your diaphragm, and even using breathing visualization are ways to use breathing exercises to relax your body and your mind. Here's a simple breathing exercise to get you started.
Meditation
Meditation is a very old, proven strategy for becoming and remaining more relaxed. Popular in the east for centuries, it's enjoyed a huge rise in popularity in the West in recent years as researchers have found proven benefits in scientific studies. (Read about the benefits of meditation here.) Meditation isn't difficult, but it does take practice. Fortunately, regular practice can help you to feel relaxed during and after each session and, over time, can actually help you to be less reactive to new stress you face. Here's a basic meditation to try.
PMR
Progressive Muscle Relaxation, or PMR, is one of my oft-used methods of getting relaxed quickly. The technique involves tensing and relaxing muscles systematically from head to toe (or from toe to head), thereby releasing tension and ushering in the relaxation response. With practice, this technique allows for total-body relaxation in a matter of seconds. And it's easy! Here's more information on Progressive Muscle Relaxation to better acquaint you with this lesser-known but very effective method of becoming quickly relaxed.
Visualizations
Because the body reacts physically to imagery created by the mind, visualizations are an effective form of getting relaxed, and are as simple and fun as daydreaming. There are many, many different visualizations you can try to get more relaxed and reverse your body's stress response. You can visualize yourself in a relaxing location, visualize a positive result from a stressing scenario, or, more simply, just visualize tension and stress leaving your body with each breath! Here's a nice breathing visualization to get you started.
Have A Good Laugh
Laughter is a wonderful, natural way to release tension in your body and get your mind in a better place so your stressors don't seem so...stressful. If you have the time, I heartily recommend seeing a nice, funny movie, or reading a funny book to get a little laughter into your day. But if you don't have the time in the schedule for that, simply maintaining a sense of humor throughout your regular day can help quite a bit in the way of keeping you relaxed. Read more about the benefits of laughter, and see these strategies for maintaining a sense of humor, and you'll have a great new tool for stress relief, if you don't use it already.
Change Your Perspective
Much of what stresses you comes not from your stressors themselves, but from your response to them. More specifically, your interpretation of your stressors, as well as your approach to dealing with them, can make the events themselves feel much more (or less) stressful. Happily, you can choose different thoughts, even if you can't choose different life circumstances. And there are a few 'tricks' for gaining a better perspective for remaining relaxed under trying conditions: first, you can adopt the thinking style of optimists by interpreting certain facets of a situation in a way that brings hope and eliminates self-doubt. You can also adopt the view that you may have more power in a situation than you realize (called having an internal locus of control, which is also known to eliminate feelings of stress), and then looking for new solutions. Finally, be sure that you're not already sabotaging yourself with overly negative thinking, and read over these common distorted thinking patterns, or cognitive distortions--do any sound familiar? If so, you can become aware of them and eliminate this type of thinking.
Whatever strategies you use, practice them and use them often, and you can maintain a much more relaxed lifestyle.
MY THOUGHTS
i've heard lots of people claim that you get more relaxed as you get older. i was beginning to think the same thing is happening to me. i seem to have less stress as the inevitable "old phase" gets closer and closer. but then i realized we don't get more relaxed because of our chronological age. some people die stressed!!! i am (now) more apt to believe that we become more relaxed as we learn to manage our stress. i've tried all the suggestions in this article. they all work. they've all been proven to be true. that's for sure. but i'm more inclined to believe that all of these relaxing strategies work for me because i have also learned to mature spiritually. when i became a Christian (hopefully getting better at it), i seemed to have gotten more in touch with my inner self, more understanding and more appreciate of the universe. as a Christian, i know, that although i have God-given talents to take control of my life, there's a higher, more supreme being that is in total and absolute control of my life. how can that fail to relax me?
Get Relaxed, Stay Relaxed!
By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com Guide
Updated September 14, 2009
About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
,The skills of becoming relaxed when necessary and remaining relaxed whenever possible can be transformative, and can make a measurable difference in health. This is because living in a state of chronic stress--remaining physiologically stressed over long periods of time, without triggering your body's relaxation response--can impact your health in a variety of negative ways. Learning to become relaxed readily and easily can bring a healthier and more enjoyable life.
Fortunately, there are several simple ways to become relaxed quickly and easily. They each bring their own unique benefits, so it's good to know a variety of techniques that you can use to become relaxed in a pinch. Here are some of my top recommendations:
Breathing Exercises
Breathing exercises are a terrific way to become relaxed quickly and easily--they can be done by just about anyone, anywhere and at any time. Slowing your breathing, breathing from your diaphragm, and even using breathing visualization are ways to use breathing exercises to relax your body and your mind. Here's a simple breathing exercise to get you started.
Meditation
Meditation is a very old, proven strategy for becoming and remaining more relaxed. Popular in the east for centuries, it's enjoyed a huge rise in popularity in the West in recent years as researchers have found proven benefits in scientific studies. (Read about the benefits of meditation here.) Meditation isn't difficult, but it does take practice. Fortunately, regular practice can help you to feel relaxed during and after each session and, over time, can actually help you to be less reactive to new stress you face. Here's a basic meditation to try.
PMR
Progressive Muscle Relaxation, or PMR, is one of my oft-used methods of getting relaxed quickly. The technique involves tensing and relaxing muscles systematically from head to toe (or from toe to head), thereby releasing tension and ushering in the relaxation response. With practice, this technique allows for total-body relaxation in a matter of seconds. And it's easy! Here's more information on Progressive Muscle Relaxation to better acquaint you with this lesser-known but very effective method of becoming quickly relaxed.
Visualizations
Because the body reacts physically to imagery created by the mind, visualizations are an effective form of getting relaxed, and are as simple and fun as daydreaming. There are many, many different visualizations you can try to get more relaxed and reverse your body's stress response. You can visualize yourself in a relaxing location, visualize a positive result from a stressing scenario, or, more simply, just visualize tension and stress leaving your body with each breath! Here's a nice breathing visualization to get you started.
Have A Good Laugh
Laughter is a wonderful, natural way to release tension in your body and get your mind in a better place so your stressors don't seem so...stressful. If you have the time, I heartily recommend seeing a nice, funny movie, or reading a funny book to get a little laughter into your day. But if you don't have the time in the schedule for that, simply maintaining a sense of humor throughout your regular day can help quite a bit in the way of keeping you relaxed. Read more about the benefits of laughter, and see these strategies for maintaining a sense of humor, and you'll have a great new tool for stress relief, if you don't use it already.
Change Your Perspective
Much of what stresses you comes not from your stressors themselves, but from your response to them. More specifically, your interpretation of your stressors, as well as your approach to dealing with them, can make the events themselves feel much more (or less) stressful. Happily, you can choose different thoughts, even if you can't choose different life circumstances. And there are a few 'tricks' for gaining a better perspective for remaining relaxed under trying conditions: first, you can adopt the thinking style of optimists by interpreting certain facets of a situation in a way that brings hope and eliminates self-doubt. You can also adopt the view that you may have more power in a situation than you realize (called having an internal locus of control, which is also known to eliminate feelings of stress), and then looking for new solutions. Finally, be sure that you're not already sabotaging yourself with overly negative thinking, and read over these common distorted thinking patterns, or cognitive distortions--do any sound familiar? If so, you can become aware of them and eliminate this type of thinking.
Whatever strategies you use, practice them and use them often, and you can maintain a much more relaxed lifestyle.
MY THOUGHTS
i've heard lots of people claim that you get more relaxed as you get older. i was beginning to think the same thing is happening to me. i seem to have less stress as the inevitable "old phase" gets closer and closer. but then i realized we don't get more relaxed because of our chronological age. some people die stressed!!! i am (now) more apt to believe that we become more relaxed as we learn to manage our stress. i've tried all the suggestions in this article. they all work. they've all been proven to be true. that's for sure. but i'm more inclined to believe that all of these relaxing strategies work for me because i have also learned to mature spiritually. when i became a Christian (hopefully getting better at it), i seemed to have gotten more in touch with my inner self, more understanding and more appreciate of the universe. as a Christian, i know, that although i have God-given talents to take control of my life, there's a higher, more supreme being that is in total and absolute control of my life. how can that fail to relax me?
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